Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
