Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
