you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
