I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
