....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
