You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
