you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
