Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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