Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
