Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
we have officially lost it.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
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