whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
