i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize