Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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