i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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