She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
