I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
