is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
