i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
