Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
He shit in the fireplace
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
