apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
It's not a walk of shame if you run
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
