Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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