Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
what day is it and did you see me today?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Randomize
