i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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