So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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