ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
