I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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