yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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