I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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