"it" just moved
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
