My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
