But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
