How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
