Ambien. No doubt about it.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
please come you make the beer taste better
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
