I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
another moral hangover. fuck.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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