I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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