Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I wish i was in the wii world.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Randomize
