this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize
