So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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