porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
