All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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