I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
