forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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