wanna go halves on a baby?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize