mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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