I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
