So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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