walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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