it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
