dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize