i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
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