You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
